7.16.23, 12:45pm

Wow, what a ride!

Feeling better today. Where they cut through my stomach muscles still hurts a lot. I hope I do not need to sneeze anytime soon. I will be in trouble. 😊

SuperNurse just left here and she fed me and helped me so much. I am nothing without her. That's a fact!❤️🙏

I sit here now listening to the raindrops and wondering how and why I was brought to this dark place of life, that I now find myself in. It is almost surreal.

When in this state your mind goes places it has never been. Death, funerals, memories, getting prepared, goodbyes and final goodbyes. The mind searches for any type of answer at all to comfort itself. It may find a few answers, but it is still scared that so many will not be found.

I have stayed away from as much as I could that has been proven to destroy the body. Never have I done drugs, smoked cigarettes or drank alcohol. I always figured these things would bring me my demise. I guess it makes me look at it differently now.

We all know that cigarettes, drugs and alcohol hurt us. We do know that the chances of getting c is a lot higher than someone who doesn't partake in these things, yet they are not immune to it.

Please stop smoking now, drink less alcohol...stay away from drugs. It is not worth it.

I honestly feel like we would almost trade our souls just to live one more day...when that day comes. Do not let that last day come to you faster by putting these things in your body. You do not ever want to be told you have c. Ever!

I start treatment hopefully this week one day. I do not know how the chemo and radiation will affect my body, but if it stops this evil inside me....then let's get it started asap!

I planned all year to leave for my dream trip on July 15th....and here it has came and went. I bet I never wait or put off again a trip or something I've always wanted to do. Life really is short and we really do not have the time we think we have.

I am ok, I am gonna beat this thing. I am gonna travel again. I am gonna be a better person. I am gonna live like each day like it will be my last...and one day I will be right.

I have six weeks of treatment. No treatments on weekends. After these six weeks I hope I can ring that bell. Oh what a sweet sound that will make.

As the raindrops make their sweet soul satisfying sound on the roof, I am gonna lay back and thank God that I still have a fighting chance.

Live----Live----Live. As my Superman Brother Tim

said near the end.

May God Bless Us All! 🙏🙏❤️😊